Hard to Lose

Sometimes you are put in situations that are very difficult to deal with. Which way do you choose? One way or the other you lose. Danged if you do, danged if you don't.

Rarely are people able to choose and have it all. Very rarely.

It was the hardest thing for me to deal with when Jacob went off to Iraq. I couldn't go to see him off because of obligations at home and I couldn't go to see him return for the same reasons.

Same thing happened when he deployed to Afghanistan. So hard. I had a heavy heart and countenance for days each time. Wanting to go, to be there yet not being able to. We did eventually get to go visit him after his last return and deployment and again before he finished his active duty. Wasn't quite what I wanted but, it was the way it had to be.

The foster parenting chapter of our lives closed, college graduation finally behind and at a job long enough to have sufficient vacation in place and so I got to go welcome home our sailor.

What a feeling of relief and release. It's okay with me if none of my children ever have to go so far away again. Really it is.

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