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Showing posts from May, 2013

What Really Matters

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He was angry! He was fire-spitting angry. The way he yelled. I had seen part of what was happening. My four-year old son and his four-year old daughter were climbing in his green apple tree. It was still a young tree as this was the first year it was producing fruit. They were climbing with their light weight bodies and so the tree wasn't being damaged. Our 'neighborly' relations were strained anyway. The house we had moved into the year before had sat empty for two years. Me thinks he was hoping to buy it and own the whole block. He and his family weren't active in Church and they had the worldly focus of getting toys. Horses, camper, trailer, etc. Not the same for us. Those were dreams we'd given up long ago. Our focus was raising our family. Getting our kids to be friends, find friends and mostly to learn to be responsible individuals and citizens. Later in the day, when the kids were long out of the tree he called-yelling. I heard his voice

You Don't Know What You're Talking About

Man, I've heard that a lot in my life. Of course I heard it a lot as a kid from my parents. So I beg the question, when do you know what you're talking about? Why even use the expression as a retort? When you feel like using that, I suspect it's time to start asking questions. Why would you think that? Why do you feel that way? What gives you cause to think that? Sometimes what one person hears is different than what the person speaking has said. Sometimes? Well, more often than not. We need to do more active listening. If we do not, the meta message being sent is, "Whatever it is you think you're saying means nothing. Therefore you mean nothing. Shut up and go away. Don't go away mad. Just go away."