What Really Matters

He was angry! He was fire-spitting angry. The way he yelled. I had seen part of what was happening. My four-year old son and his four-year old daughter were climbing in his green apple tree.

It was still a young tree as this was the first year it was producing fruit. They were climbing with their light weight bodies and so the tree wasn't being damaged. Our 'neighborly' relations were strained anyway.

The house we had moved into the year before had sat empty for two years. Me thinks he was hoping to buy it and own the whole block. He and his family weren't active in Church and they had the worldly focus of getting toys. Horses, camper, trailer, etc. Not the same for us. Those were dreams we'd given up long ago. Our focus was raising our family. Getting our kids to be friends, find friends and mostly to learn to be responsible individuals and citizens.

Later in the day, when the kids were long out of the tree he called-yelling. I heard his voice in stereo. Over the phone and through the windows. Was my kid over there today? Yes. Climbing in my apple tree? Yes. Well, he picked my apples and because they aren't ripe he bit them and threw them down on the ground-wasted.

Funny that. That four-year old is nearly 30. The tree owner has since then bought the small parcel of land beside his, moved his fence line, annexed his back yard (with the apple tree) into that land, built a gas station and moved from the house. The new owners could care less about the apple tree.

Such vehemence and what a sorry and sad excuse to not be neighborly. Somehow we need to just get over how great and wonderful we are and our landscaping and get on with life.

Did I teach my kids not to trespass on others private property? Yes. Did we have a neighbor who had a fit and a half if you walked across their lawn? Yes (they planted rose bushes all around the border of their lawn to keep people off the lawn). Did I teach my kids the concept that when they were newspaper carriers they were given permission to go to the peoples houses but they should verify it was okay to go across their lawn before they did it? Yes. If you have permission, you're not trespassing-but remember it is still private property.

When the four-year olds were climbing in the tree it was with both mother's permission-they were playing. Neither of us knew that the kids were picking the little green unripe apples. Oddly though he could blame my four-year old but I'm not sure if he knew his was part and party to the escapade!

Sorry old tree. Wonder what other stories it has to tell. On second thought, it probably watched their dog Max climb my fence and get my Buffy in a family way. I probably don't even want to think about that one!

Moral of the story? Cool your jets. People and relationships are most important. Simply having a conversation about did you notice your son playing in my tree today? Yes, he was with your daughter. Oh, well, we better watch them closer. They picked nearly all the unripe apples off and this was the first crop from that tree and I was really looking forward to them.