Stories of Endearment
One of my little girls, who was growing older and not so little anymore asked me why everyone calls her 'given name-ie'. I explained it was a way for people who met her and could see her loving and accepting personality to express their reciprocal love. Her name had become a term of endearment from them to her.
Recently at a family gathering we were sitting, standing and visiting when the inevitable 'old' stories popped up. Some families when these stories pop up, family members are offended, hurt, and the stories drive them apart.
Thank Heavens our family isn't like that. We laugh and cajole back and forth-never in a malicious manner. Here are some of the stories.
Child number one, at age 1 year while I was cleaning out the refrigerator, reached for the bottle of Tabasco sauce. Yes, I kept it in the fridge. Anything I didn't know was safe to leave in a cupboard I kept in the fridge. He reached in, took it out and was determined to drink that very pretty red sauce. Have you ever tried to take something away from a one year old? Well, they scream and throw a fit. But I had recently read a book about natural consequences. I hadn't heard of anyone getting permanently maimed from eating Tabasco sauce. Not saying it ain't possible-I just hadn't heard of it. So I facilitated him by removing the cap and he started drinking. I was really afraid he could get too much and be screaming. The kid had no taste buds. I took the bottle away-uncertain which was going to be more uncomfortable-his screaming from too hot a mouth or his screaming from having the desired object abruptly taken away. Neither happened. He seemed to want more, reaching for it. I said no and he found something else to torment me with-or rather investigate. He has a raw egg/charcoal/Order of the Arrow story he'll tell you if you really want to get him going. If you do, ask him about weeding dirt clods in the garden too.
Child number two spills things. Knocks them over at the table and generally can get the person across the table wet before anyone realizes what's happened. That child sometimes jokes about having a hole in the lower lip-things seem to end up down the front of clothing.
Child number three picked up the HUGE bottle of Pace Picante Sauce and gave it a good shake and got salsa all over the curtains, the wall, the table... Yeah-that's what we laugh about. The one story we laugh hardest about though is the Christmas season behavior warranted a lump of coal and this child was warned of this repeatedly. Come Christmas there was no gift under the tree. The child was so hurt and crushed by this even hurtling itself on its present-laden bed in tears did not redeem the parents.
Child number four was insatiably curious about everything. When someone got a watch or a calculator, this child would bide the time and when the opportune moment presented itself, kipe it and take it apart to see how it worked. Except its own watch. That's how we figured out what was happening. This child's watch was the only one not lost, broken, or taken apart! My biggest fear is that when this child has babies-that mother had better be watchful and not leave the child unattended. Babies don't just glue back together! If you want to hear another trick this child pulled ask about making English Toffee and the burning/smoking hot pan and the going out the back door but couldn't open the door so set the pan on the linoleum floor to open the door. Yeah-there was a black spot on the floor for a good long time. The 'other' story which isn't suitable for the Internet involves the value and importance of wearing underwear-especially if your jeans have zippers. Another on child number four. This child had, during a personal curiosity satisfying experiment, unscrewed the sprayer nozzle at the kitchen sink. Later a visiting family friend, Genola, had in all innocence gone to the kitchen sink to get a glass of water. She turned the faucet on and whoosh! She had an Old Faithful gushing forth all over here and the kitchen! Maybe that's why she doesn't come visit anymore. :(
Child number five baked a cake from scratch. Misreading the measurements, using 1 1/4 c. instead of 1 1/4 T. of baking powder, the cake bubbled over the sides and all over the oven. The really funny part is child number one and child number three actually ate the cake (child number one at least has the excuse of no taste buds)! There are other 'interesting' conversational stories we tell about child number five, but not over the Internet. If you were really curious you would ask one of the rest of us to tell you about a four year old running and hugging visitors who came to our home.
Child number six at age 9 or 10 had used all the hot water doing dishes. It was also bath time. Being an inventive and genius at finding a work-around, the child boiled a pan of water on the stove, walked it carefully down the hall to the bathroom, carefully straddled the tub and began pouring the boiling hot water in the tub. On the foot that was in the tub. Yeah! INSTANT second degree burns. But if you really want to get this one talking, ask about the time mom said, "Once in a while parents get an opportunity to check their child's level of maturation."
Where do they get all this stuff? Probably from their dad. He's the one who puts bell pepper in sage stuffing. He's the one who uses Pinesol instead of oil to fry his eggs for breakfast. He's the one who hits his thumb with a hammer and exclaims, "Cuss, cuss, swear, swear". Seriously-that's a direct quote.
Recently at a family gathering we were sitting, standing and visiting when the inevitable 'old' stories popped up. Some families when these stories pop up, family members are offended, hurt, and the stories drive them apart.
Thank Heavens our family isn't like that. We laugh and cajole back and forth-never in a malicious manner. Here are some of the stories.
Child number one, at age 1 year while I was cleaning out the refrigerator, reached for the bottle of Tabasco sauce. Yes, I kept it in the fridge. Anything I didn't know was safe to leave in a cupboard I kept in the fridge. He reached in, took it out and was determined to drink that very pretty red sauce. Have you ever tried to take something away from a one year old? Well, they scream and throw a fit. But I had recently read a book about natural consequences. I hadn't heard of anyone getting permanently maimed from eating Tabasco sauce. Not saying it ain't possible-I just hadn't heard of it. So I facilitated him by removing the cap and he started drinking. I was really afraid he could get too much and be screaming. The kid had no taste buds. I took the bottle away-uncertain which was going to be more uncomfortable-his screaming from too hot a mouth or his screaming from having the desired object abruptly taken away. Neither happened. He seemed to want more, reaching for it. I said no and he found something else to torment me with-or rather investigate. He has a raw egg/charcoal/Order of the Arrow story he'll tell you if you really want to get him going. If you do, ask him about weeding dirt clods in the garden too.
Child number two spills things. Knocks them over at the table and generally can get the person across the table wet before anyone realizes what's happened. That child sometimes jokes about having a hole in the lower lip-things seem to end up down the front of clothing.
Child number three picked up the HUGE bottle of Pace Picante Sauce and gave it a good shake and got salsa all over the curtains, the wall, the table... Yeah-that's what we laugh about. The one story we laugh hardest about though is the Christmas season behavior warranted a lump of coal and this child was warned of this repeatedly. Come Christmas there was no gift under the tree. The child was so hurt and crushed by this even hurtling itself on its present-laden bed in tears did not redeem the parents.
Child number four was insatiably curious about everything. When someone got a watch or a calculator, this child would bide the time and when the opportune moment presented itself, kipe it and take it apart to see how it worked. Except its own watch. That's how we figured out what was happening. This child's watch was the only one not lost, broken, or taken apart! My biggest fear is that when this child has babies-that mother had better be watchful and not leave the child unattended. Babies don't just glue back together! If you want to hear another trick this child pulled ask about making English Toffee and the burning/smoking hot pan and the going out the back door but couldn't open the door so set the pan on the linoleum floor to open the door. Yeah-there was a black spot on the floor for a good long time. The 'other' story which isn't suitable for the Internet involves the value and importance of wearing underwear-especially if your jeans have zippers. Another on child number four. This child had, during a personal curiosity satisfying experiment, unscrewed the sprayer nozzle at the kitchen sink. Later a visiting family friend, Genola, had in all innocence gone to the kitchen sink to get a glass of water. She turned the faucet on and whoosh! She had an Old Faithful gushing forth all over here and the kitchen! Maybe that's why she doesn't come visit anymore. :(
Child number five baked a cake from scratch. Misreading the measurements, using 1 1/4 c. instead of 1 1/4 T. of baking powder, the cake bubbled over the sides and all over the oven. The really funny part is child number one and child number three actually ate the cake (child number one at least has the excuse of no taste buds)! There are other 'interesting' conversational stories we tell about child number five, but not over the Internet. If you were really curious you would ask one of the rest of us to tell you about a four year old running and hugging visitors who came to our home.
Child number six at age 9 or 10 had used all the hot water doing dishes. It was also bath time. Being an inventive and genius at finding a work-around, the child boiled a pan of water on the stove, walked it carefully down the hall to the bathroom, carefully straddled the tub and began pouring the boiling hot water in the tub. On the foot that was in the tub. Yeah! INSTANT second degree burns. But if you really want to get this one talking, ask about the time mom said, "Once in a while parents get an opportunity to check their child's level of maturation."
Where do they get all this stuff? Probably from their dad. He's the one who puts bell pepper in sage stuffing. He's the one who uses Pinesol instead of oil to fry his eggs for breakfast. He's the one who hits his thumb with a hammer and exclaims, "Cuss, cuss, swear, swear". Seriously-that's a direct quote.
Comments
Thanks, Mom.